not all


In my dream I was at your house with you and your husband(?) and it was descending into aggressive motions, words and stares. We went outside and it was Los Angeles. A low-rider swerved towards us and crashed into the curb. From the window men started shouting aggressively at your husband and asking if you’d been with other people and if he cared and if he was going to do anything about it. I was worried because I felt that they knew I had been with you. You fell over on the pavement, drunk, in a short and awful dress that revealed your underwear as you lay there for a few moments before getting up. I wondered what I was doing there… how I’d got involved in all of this and how it was that you wouldn’t walk away from it. As you rose to your feet you called to your husband saying that you wanted to go out and have a good time… you both got into the car and drove away. I awoke and felt a desolate despair. A helplessness set in as I realised I was powerless to do anything to get you away from him. I felt even more concerned by the fact that I understood deep within that I didn’t want you to leave him, I just wanted you to spend some of your time with me. A lot of your time but not all of it.  

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