exercise in futility


Illness and extreme fatigue set in after night upon night of drinking until the early hours of the morning and then getting up a few hours later to go to work. But after ten or eleven hours of sleep I feel somewhat human again and today we shall try it all again. My colleague said to me ‘we are partying with doctors and surgeons, so it is going to be okay to test the limits.’
            Regardless of it all, I see a disastrous waste in the things that people do. The futility of it all. The constant struggle as people strive to find love and happiness and that perfect job and home and car… all the while time marches on relentlessly and old age creeps up. Turning around it appears that everyone is young and if we are still single and childless at 40, no one can understand it. Young women reject it and express their desire to have children and to get married.
            The truth is out there, just partially hidden… it is hidden in books, films, and music. People understand the suffering but, of course, mankind is taught above all that negative thought and pessimism are the absolute sins. But it is not negative thought, it is truth. Simple truth.

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