clinging to the wreckage

The darkness of day filters grey into the black of night and the heart sinks like a sick sunset. Songs are sung and not heard by the heart that bleeds as blind and oblivious lovers feed on the cruel dripping fuel of their love. The temperature plunges well below zero and there is no hero who can save us now. Trump’s triumph has raised waves of hysteria and as some shout ‘holocaust’ others cling to their dollar, amazed by its resounding strength. In dreams they knock on the door and dance in fits of desire but, alas, the room is all but darkness and cold. Wintry winds howl and their sound is the music at the party of despair and oblivion. We fight for survival, we compete and we feast upon each other. We destroy what is good in the name of change for progress and we render ourselves unnecessary along the way. Our interactions have become tainted with shallow need. Men seek beauty and sex, they want a trophy they can show. Women want company and love but that must come with weal

Nothing has changed. I still watch French films in foreign places and think of you. I’ve sat on my couch in England, Spain and now the USA and watched these films… forever making me think of you, forever making me feel a greater sense of distance from you. In this new life there is a sense of sadness in all I do and I don’t know if I am simply expecting too much or if time is flying by and leaving me behind. It’s a mess… life is a mess. I’ve thought about you perpetually since June 2013 and yet I no longer even believe in the possibility of love. Even if I did, there is nothing… we have nothing. You won’t even talk to me any more because of the fear of the threat you think that I pose. There have been complicated times in the past and we have not always been at ease but now there is a true and final silence. The inevitable end to every friendship that blossoms between a single person and one who is involved (if there is any form of attraction) because the partner of the involv