mother

 It’s been five months since my mother passed away and I feel like I miss her more now than ever. I see and think so many things each day that I want to share with her. And I think of her life and how it had good and happy moments, but it had a lot of pain and sadness… it could have been much better. It also could have been worse, I suppose. And today is Mother’s Day… it’s one of contemplation. I think back to, and through, the times that she walked me to school in England and in South Africa. How she had shared in my triumphs and turmoils; every moment from receiving a semester or year-end report card to the moments I was anxious about an exam or a speech or a school play. In some way, it turns on a brighter light of introspection and moments from the past come back in vivid clarity. I can almost feel the atmosphere of the moment, smell the air, recall the exact brightness, capture the feeling… something that happened 30 years ago, in some cases. It also makes one more aware of the passing of time. When everyone is talking in harmony about their mothers on Mother’s Day, and your mother is no longer around, you are usually no longer one of the youngest in the crowd. Most things lie in the past and not in the future.

 

                My mother and father in Uvongo, South Africa


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