phantom

Memories come and memories go… but I recall driving to Newbury where you had booked a hotel for us for one night. At the time of the booking, we were innocent. We were less innocent when the night arrived. Afterwards, we were bathed in sin. It was delicious and delightful. It was also when love was forged. I saw you looking into the mirror and, whenever you did, one of your eyes would lose focus and look towards your nose. It was one of the most adorable things I had ever seen. The next day, I saw you crying as you sat in your car behind mine. As I drove home my phone rang and it was your friend telling me that I was your dream man. I couldn’t understand it. You were not completely free. Hence the tears. We intended for that to be the last night… to walk away and get on with our lives, but it was not to be. We fell in love. We spent many days and nights together and there were times I couldn’t understand how. I began to wonder if the other was merely a phantom. An apparition to allow you to keep your distance. He was real, he just didn’t care… and neither did you. Yet, you wanted children, and I did not. He did. And, so, it was decided.


            Guildford Castle




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