true to you

 Is it a new beginning… or the beginning of the end? It’s a New Year and yet, on some level, it feels like I am suffocating. On the one hand, I am starting to deeply love literature once again, as I have all of my life, but it is renewed, and I am reading and writing more. On the other hand, I feel as if I am not bringing much value or receiving much love in other areas of life. Therefore, I focus on quiet… and the beauty of the written word. It never fails to fascinate me that people feel a sensitivity that is deep enough to want to capture the daily moments of life. Not in the way most films do… in films it seems there always has to be a terrible tragedy to work around, I rarely see films that are just about life and the day to day and people trying to find meaning in the banal. This can be found everywhere in literature, because the writing style, the words, the thoughts… they make it beautiful even if it is just describing a brief walk through the city or next to a river.

There are times in life when we feel needed, people come to us for help and advice and guidance. Then there are times when it seems that we are the ones who need help, and everyone around merely tolerates or accommodates us. It is a crisis of confidence. It becomes so bad at times that I even suspect I pass it on to every sports team that I support. They all seem to be losing every game. One of the things that keeps me sane is feeding a stray cat that lives in the car park of my building. We have been acquainted for two years now and he has survived extreme heat and, right now, extreme cold. He is wise and beautiful. I called him Fundar, Spanish for ‘founded’. It’s the tiny light that comes from seeing him after a search, or several days without a sighting, that brings a joyful meaning beyond most other things in life. People will push you aside, or mistreat you, because they are jealous of you. People will sever ties because you get upset when you discover that they are cheating on you or have lied to you. Animals don’t do that. Animals are true. And, as for the people, it was once written that the best form of revenge is living well.

Of all things, be true to yourself and be genuine. The rest will fall into place.


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