Hip Hop

 There was a woman in England, I called her Hip Hop because she didn’t want her real name to be thrown around. She called me Lion Cub for reasons only she knew. It was passionate love. It was forbidden, which made it all the more passionate. I had not considered it possible that such a beautiful, sexy, individual would ever have any interest in me but, for some reason, she did. She was eleven years younger than me. I was thirty-five. I think that she liked my innocence, my softness, my manners… I suppose this is why ‘Lion Cub’ was the preferred name. Last night she appeared in my dream, and it was erotic whilst being innocent. Both naked, I stood behind her, with my arms around her, and we looked into a mirror. She told me I was beautiful, and I almost laughed out loud. Then I awoke and spent the day plagued by thoughts and memories. 

                  It ended because I didn’t want to have children. Like many of my relationships… ending because I did not have traditional goals. Now, occasionally, people from my past will reach out to me and say things like ‘you are so lucky.’ Naturally, I ask why. One individual said, ‘you earn an adult’s salary and live a teenager’s life.’ I would not say I live a teenager’s life, I do have a lot of responsibility at work, but it is true that I am free to travel, to move, to change, to take risks, and beyond. Many say, ‘you are always travelling, always in a different city or country.’ It’s true that in the last fifteen years, I have travelled a lot and lived in three different countries but, once again, this is because I chose not to do other things such as buy a home or have children. 

                  Even though I reminisce about these old times… I am ultimately happy in peaceful solitude these days. Building an invisible empire, that will outlive me, and creating on a daily basis even though it brings absolutely no financial reward whatsoever. Life is good!